Classic Thinking
by debook210
Summary: Post Aliyah. Tony is thinking about things after Ziva stays in Israel.
1. She walked into mine

Disclaimer: I don't own the characters of NCIS or Casablanca.

Special thanks to Scare4irony and Ranel U. Owle for reading this fic for me. I really enjoy our discussions and really appreciate your thoughts!!

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_"Of all the gin joints in all the towns in all the world, she walks into mine" - Rick Blaine in Casablanca_

_" I guess she'll call when she's ready"- Aliyah, Tony NCIS_

As the cell phone closed, he couldn't help but think about the events that had led up to this moment. Seeing her for the first time, attempting to impress her and then wondering why she both scared and impressed him. Where had the time gone and why had things gone so wrong? Thinking.. serious thinking had never really been his thing. His thing was tv shows and movies....well and tormenting Probie. But lately he encountered people who had forced him to think and to grow up.

First there was Kate. Man what a woman! She was smart, funny and wouldn't put up with his tricks. While there was time in which he considered dating her, what they had become was so much more important. They were more like brother-sister than boyfriend girlfriend. And that also fit the family dynamic so much better. Yet when Ari killed Kate, it almost tore their family apart at the seams. Gibbs, the father figure to all of them, had been so torn up by Kate's death that he almost got killed himself. Of course, we didn't know about Kelly or Shannon then either. Knowing about his family changed the way that he viewed him, made him value his relationship with Gibbs much more.

And when Ziva came...well that wasn't the easiest of transitions.. For one, the entire team kept expecting Kate to be there and tell them to shove it. Especially me..but once you got used to the daily idiom mistakes and the threats upon your person, it was kinda cool. And there were times in which the tension could be cut by knife, maybe one of Ziva's many knives that she hid about her person at all times. And other times, it was all too easy to convince her to join him in one of his many tricks against the Elflord.

Of course, that closeness that Ziva and he had shared had been broken when he took the Benoit assignment. When he first accepted that assignment, Tony never dreamed what it would cost him. His first real love ( not that he was expecting to fall in love, not really), the team's trust, Gibbs' trust, and the closeness that he and she had once shared. It hadn't been completely his fault though. She was to blame as well. After she was framed by the Iranians, it had been Gibbs who she turned to and not him. Granted it was to keep him and the others safe but it didn't mean that it didn't hurt. Yet as he began his assignment of seducing the daughter of an international arms dealer, he could sense her frustration as he began to be more and more secretive.

And those secrets had been his undoing. It was supposed to be a simple assignment. Get close to the daughter so that he could get close to the father and maybe catch him in a deal. Simple, right? Wrong. Tony shook his head and wondered at his former naivety. Nothing that involves hearts is ever simple. If anything, people's hearts are some of the most complicated things on the planet earth. If the events with Jeanne hadn't taught him that, well the events of the last six months most certainly had.

It had begun with the Director's death. He had been sent along with Ziva to provide protection for the Director of NCIS as she attended the funeral of one of her oldest friends and former agents. Yet things spiraled out of control after she released them from their escort duties. And that action resulted ended in her death. Yes she died with her boots on but what was the cost? Tony was left with emotional scars that he still held. Perhaps if the team hadn't been broken up right after her death, he might have had a better chance of healing from those.

But the team had been broken up. By the toothpick, who was trying to garner favor from his higher ups by promising to clean house. Yet he did so in way that ruined one of the best MCRT teams in the D.C. area. Had he not broken up the team, Tony would have trusted Ziva implicitly and Rivkin would be back in Tel Aviv, alive, if nothing else. Instead Tony, McGee and Gibbs were left with an empty desk, lots of memories and a sense of helplessness. And it was Tony who had risked everything to protect his partner and the woman that he loved. Only to have it all thrown back in his face because she no longer knew who she trusted...because she like him, had been used to further a Director's needs.

As the elevator chimed closed, Tony looked up and noticed the bull pen was emptying for the day. McGee was packing up and Gibbs nodded. Sighing, Tony gathered his things and began to make his way to the elevator, then to his car and then up the stairs to his apartment.

Once inside, he turned on the TV, just for background noise. Maybe in a minute he'd watch something as he once again battled against his inner demons and tried to decide whether it was worth being hungover in the morning just to spend the night oblivious to the memories and the desires for the woman who was long gone.

However as the black box flickered to life, he heard the words that in his mind expressed it all.

Why it had been Ziva who walked into NCIS that day instead of some other Mossad Officer, he'll never know. Yet he can't help but hope that maybe one day this mess will be cleared and he'll be able to say the end line of that movie and it will the line that expresses it all. But right now?

The only words he manages to get past his burning throat is _"Of all the gin joints in all the towns in all the world, she walks into mine."_

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A/N: This is my first fanfic, so please review!! I'd love to see what people think of this story. I'm thinking of turning it into a longer story if anyone is interested.

Can't wait to see what y'all think!!


	2. One out and another one in

Disclaimer: I own only my computer, socks and the imaginary cat that I got for my birthday....

A/N: This chapter goes to ltjvt1026 who gave me the quote for this chapter!! Thanks for the suggestion!!

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_"First they take Ugarte then she(Ilsa) walks in. Well, I guess thats the way it goes...one out and one in." -Rick Blaine Casablanca_

_"I need to be able to trust the people that I work with." -Ziva Aliyah NCIS_

It was the waiting that was worst. The torture and questions were easy. Those required one's full attention to avoid giving away any emotion or reaction to the question or the torture. Yet after the questions ended and the torture ended, that was when the true torture began. In the distance, she could hear the yells and pleas from other victims.

The voices ranged from scared to defiant to defeated. The voices of terrorist torturing their victims rose above it all and showed methodical means of controlling both the prisoners as well as their captors. The languages revealed defiant Americans to sturdy Poles to cocky Arabs. Yet all of this meant nothing to Ziva David who was only trying to avoid thinking about the events that had brought her to this place. She took this mission as a way of trying to sort out who she trusted and to see if who she was and who she wanted to be. A death cry went up amongst the cells to her right. not that she could hear much beyond the four walls which were her cell and very likely her dying spot.

Yet as the man was dragged out, she could help but think of a line of a movie..._"one out and one in." _ She didn't know why that phrase popped out of her head but she knew why she knew it. Tony. Just thinking about him brought back all the memories of hanging out, watching movies and eating pizza. Just one more, Come on, Ziva. What do you mean you've never seen..... It's only the best classic movie of all time...

Seeing his face after being in Israel for four months, seeing his face after Jenny's death, Seeing his face after Jeanne's betrayal...and seeing his face after she was framed by the Iranians. She never would admit it to his face but she was glad to see him support her even in the midst of all the incriminating evidence against her.

Then without realizing it, Ziva began to think about the events that had changed the relationship between her and the NCIS team but mostly the events that had changed the relationship between her and Tony. How had things gone so far north? She knew that Tony had her six, no matter what when she was framed by the Iranians, but when Michael...when Michael came to her stateside, she could even trust Tony enough to trust him to tell him Michael was in town or that she and Michael were merely romantically involved. Was it the four months in Israel, apart from everyone who she knew loved and trusted her because she was Ziva David and not because she was Ziva David, super spy and agent.

Or was it before then? was it when Jenny put Tony on that ridiculous undercover mission? It seemed like every time that she and Tony were able to get their vibes on the same tidelength, something or someone would keep them from doing anything. First there was the awkward getting to know you stage, then Gibbs left and came back. Then she was framed by the Iranians and told that she was being followed because her father didn't trust her. After that Tony went on that undercover mission, was nearly blown up and their team was nearly torn apart. Then Jenny died and the team really was broken up. Sent to the farthest four corners of the globe, they tried to keep in touch but it just wasn't the same.

Another yell pierced through Ziva's thoughts and she shuddered unconsciously. When had she gotten so lost? Was it after Ari's death? Or was it living in the US? She used to know who she was and what she wanted. Now even if she wanted to, She couldn't even leave to talk to Gibbs for direction. She trusted him implicitly. That was something. Since that night nearly four years ago, she had always trusted Gibbs with her life.

And she trusted Abby, dear Abby. Always there for you if something went incredibly wrong or incredibly right. She always had a hug for you, even if it meant the loss of oxygen for a few moments. She trusted McGee. He might have just been a computer geek when she first met him but now she was certain he was a man who could convince most people of things. Not quite up to Dinozzo's standards, but he was a competent field agent and was a good loyal friend.

But it was Tony who she wasn't sure of... Deep down, Ziva knew that he did really mean those things that he said about the fight and why he went to her apartment that night. Yet if she admitted it to herself that she knew that he was right, then she would be the chump. And that would mean that her father only cared about her as assassin and not as a daughter. If she was to accept that, she would give up. For if her father didn't care about her, who did? Her OWN father. So it was Tony who was in wrong... It had to be...right? Maybe it was time for her to stop thinking...just focus on staying alive..

Her door creaked open again for the third time that day and she heard yet another scream from within the compound...And she couldn't help but think about that line that Tony was obsessed with.

_"Well, I guess that's the way it goes...one out and one in."_

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A/ N: I'm sooo thankful to everyone who has read this story. I wasn't expecting so many people to read this story. Thanks to everyone who favorited it and if y'all could review

that would be wonderful because then I could see what y'all like and y'all don't. If anyone has a movie quote from a classic movie, then please either pm or review this story and let me know! I would love to try and work it into the story!! Thanks a bunch!!!


	3. A box of Chocolates

Wow...the reponse totally surprised me...so in return i'm going to post another chapter...that and i'm going to Arkansas for the weekend...hope you like this chapter.

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_"Mama always said life was like a box of chocolates. You never know what you're gonna get." -Forest Gump_

_"But maybe that's the way you'd prefer it"- Tony Aliyah NCIS_

As the weeks went by, Tony did more and more thinking. He kept going back to that conversation. It became known as THE conversation in his mind. The one conversation that changed everything. Had he known that it was to be their last conversation, then perhaps he would said, done something differently. Or at least that's what he told himself. Deep down he knew that no matter what he did, every scenario came out the same way. It ended with him arguing with the woman that he loved and had tried to protect her from others who were using her. It ended with him and her going to Israel and then him going back to the States without her. It ended with him alone, without her.

Maybe it would have been better to let Rivkin kill him. Maybe she was right, and then she would be stateside and he wouldn't be in this misery. Of course then he wouldn't be alive because that look in Rivkin's eyes was anything but pleasant. If anything, he was enraged that Tony had been able to take him on in a fight. Of course all the alcohol that Rivkin had consumed had helped Tony. Yet that help had only ended with one ending: with Ziva in Israel and furious with him.

Shaking his head, Tony went to back to the bull pen and resumed working on the mound of paperwork that was on his desk. The team hadn't caught a case in a week and as a result, he had been working on catching up on all the paperwork. And it had been a while since they had done paperwork, since before THE incident. So not only did he have to complete his own paperwork but he also had to finish hers as well. He thought he knew what he was getting into. Yet with each file and with each written page, her voice came through loud and clear. He couldn't help smile ruefully at her no-nonsense writing and her brisk tone. Very official yet very Ziva.

Despite his sardonic mirth at her style, it became harder and harder to read each file. He realized that he was in trouble the moment that he opened up the first file however he couldn't put it off forever. And the sooner it was started, the sooner it was over. Yet he missed her even more with each written page. He missed the fun that they used to have together. Even before everything with Rivkin. Before Jenny's death, Ziva and Tony used to hang out and have pointless arguments about American Idioms, Tony's stupid stuff and many other things. They also used to have serious conversations. These were rarer but Tony cherished them all the more for it. Especially after the Jeanne fiasco, when Ziva tried to help Tony move on. While he didn't appreciate the prodding into his feelings, he was grateful that she cared enough to prod him.

Sighing inwardly, he began again on the files. Glancing across the way, where she used to sit, Tony realised that he didn't know what he was getting into. He never had and perhaps that was why he had begun thinking. Maybe next time...if there ever would be a next time, he would go in with his head and not his heart. Yet he knew two things for certain. One that no amount of thinking would change what had happened. And two,life always threw curveballs that you were never expecting. It was as Forest Gump so aptly put, _"Life's like a box of chocolates, you never know what you're going to get."_


	4. Coming back

Well I'm back and I was able to work on this fanfic while I was in AR. But I do apologize in advance because i'm going to move things around, because i like to be even and i realize while i had no internet, this story was very unbalanced and....yes i'm a little ocd... but here's the next chapter. Can't wait to see what you think of it!!!

oh and I own nothing except a bunch of bug bites from arkansas.

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_"I'll be back" - The Terminator_

_"You're given orders, you may not like them but you follow them"-Ziva Agent Afloat NCIS_

Alone. She was once again alone...they left her alone to allow her time to understand the consequences of her defiance. Blood dripped from her fingers, multiple cuts permeated her body,

and perhaps a broken bone or two. If someone who knew her from before, saw what she had been turned into, they would be astounded, upset and perhaps rage. But it depended upon who it was and what country they hailed from. If they were from America, those would be the reactions and emotions that would be shown and perhaps more. Yet if they were from Israel, they would be amazed and yet would be glad that she hadn't given in, thought it had cost her body. They would commend her and give her another mission to go on despite the dangers to her.

Maybe that was why she was on this mission in the first place. Her inability to make a choice between the land that she loved as a child or the land that she had come to love as an adult. If she were to follow her head, she would have never come back to America as a liaison officer after the break up of the team. It would have been more logical to stay put and continue on as a mossad officer. She knew that her father wasn't pleased with the changes that had occurred while she lived in America. And She also knew that he would be pleased to send another agent in her place, just to throw a screwdriver in the works of NCIS.

Despite all of his talk about needing the close ties to America, He would rather have her as his personal assassin for him to boss about. She was the best and when she was at the top of her game then it was bad day to be on the black list of Eli David. Either you died a horrible but silent death or you wish you had because you made the worst deal possible. Yet she wasn't at the top of her game, and now she was paying the price for it. She realized that when she had come back to America, she had been torn even before she stepped onto that plane. She wanted to remain with her family in Israel as horrid as they may have seem to outsiders, they were still family. And she thought that maybe Michael actually might have developed feelings for her, maybe just maybe.

Yet she wanted to go back to the family that was more of a family to her than her real family was. They cared if something good happened to her, they cared if something bad happened to her. And they were always there for her, no matter what and no strings attached. When she had been framed by the Iranians, it had been Gibbs, not her father, who she had run to. It was Abby who she had called and not Michael for help. For every time she had gone to her father for help, it always cost something. It may not have been big initially or when the bargain was originally made, but it almost always grew into this thing that was so huge that you wondered where it ended.

She thought about Ari and how that had spun out of control. When she had first come to her father in regards to Ari, he had ordered to her to extract him. But things changed after she met Gibbs who would not stop going after Ari. And when she spoke with her father again, he gave her an order that broke her heart but because she was still the obedient daughter, agent, and best mossad officer, she followed it.

Instead of pulling him out of the Hamas cell and dealing with him on Israel soil, Director David ordered his daughter to kill, no murder his only son. He had told Ziva to do in a way that would benefit Mossad, no matter what. She had moved through that day with a pleasant manner but inwardly was a robot. And when it came down to the moment, she heard Ari speak of their father in such a manner that she grew disgusted with him for letting it get this far and she was disgusted with herself for allowing her father to manipulate her and Ari. So when she heard about the liaison position that was being opened up, she jumped at the chance to get away from her father and mossad for awhile. Just for a time, just to sort out what exactly she believed. And now it seemed she was doing that again. Only instead of questioning who her father was, she was questioning who she was and what was truly important to her.

Once after a rough assignment, Gibbs had told her that she needed to figure out whether she trusted her judgment or not. He said, the minute you don't, is the minute you need to get out of the game. it had helped in that moment, just as it began to help now. She knew that she trusted Gibbs, no matter what. Whether he would trust her after her father's orders had been revealed was another story.

But regardless of whether he trusted her or not, she no longer trusted her father. Or the men that he considered to be worthy of trust. And if she did not trust her father, she knew that she would not be able to return mossad and be what her father wanted her to be. The perfect spy and assassin had been destroyed the minute she heard Ari's hatred of her father and his thoughts of him. Yet it had taken until now for her to realize what exactly that meant for her. It meant that NCIS was her only family now.

The thump of boots echoed down the corridor and into the chamber as Ziva begun to realize who her loyalties lied to. Before sending her on this mission, her father had told her that even he didn't know who she was loyal to. Now thanks to him, she now knew that she was loyal to NCIS and no matter what, she was investigator and not a killer.

As the thumping grew louder and hinges on the door began to squeak, she began to regain hope. They had tried for what seemed like days to break her and get the information on NCIS. Perhaps they just didn't understand her, perhaps they overestimated their powers of persuasion. Either way, she was never going to give me the information they sought nor would they ever be able to break her spirit. And even though she knew the odds of her coming back to the civilized world, to the states and even coming back to NCIS were slim to none, she knew if she didn't give it her all, it would be a discredit to the family who taught her that you can have a life and still catch the bad guys. They taught her that it does not have be all work and no play.

She smiled as a line from one of Tony's stupid movies ran through her head as the terrorist came closer to her and pulled her head up by her hair. "What are you smiling about? Are you going to tell me what I need to know or do we have to go through this useless routine again?" asked the terrorist.

Ziva muttered something under her breath and the terrorist forced her to look at him and repeat what she said. She smiled an evil smile under all the bruising and swelling and said _"I'll be back."_


	5. Looking at You

SO sorry it's taken me so long to update...it's been a crazy busy week...no excuse but i hope to get two chapters written and posted by Sat/Sun

Loved all the alerts and reviews!! Please please REVIEW!! I love reading what other people think of the chapters!

Disclaimer: If i owned them, then ziva wouldn't be stuck in a terrorist camp and tony wouldn't have a broken arm...

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_"Here's Looking at You Kid. " -Rick Blaine in Casablanca_

_"It's not just me I'm worrying about" - Tony NCIS _

I wonder where she's at right now? Is she walking along river with a hansome bloke pretending to be someone she's not? Is she deep within a terrorist cell preparing the final operation that at the last minute will be foiled by her? Or she is in an office reviewing files and statements and preparing to brief her superiors about the success of a recent mission? The one thing I seriously doubt is happening is that she's thinking about me. Or if she is thinking about me, then it's only to curse me and then forget me.

But for some reason, despite my best efforts, I can't seem to forget her. Her quirky way of misquoting American idioms, the way she would casually play with her knife or her way of getting in my space and making it all cool and hot at the same time. She probably wouldn't give me the time of day, if I saw her in the street today. Not that would be happening any time soon. For she had chosen to remain behind in Israel because she didn't trust the team...well not the team...me. She didn't trust me.

Gibbs never told me why she wasn't coming back. But I knew. I knew the instant she flew into her apartment and pointed her gun at me. I knew at that moment she would have a hard time ever trusting me again. And while I had hoped it would not come to pass, with each moment spent in Israel, She would be distancing herself from everyone in reach. And after that conversation and being left on the ground, I knew things had changed forever. She would never come near me again willingly.

Nor would she be my partner.

Yet despite the fact that she would never trust me again, I couldn't stop myself from worrying about her. Whether she would call or even if she was okay. And I couldn't help but wish I could go back in time and rewind the events that changed all of our lives. I wish I could have just waited five minutes or that Abby and I could have just found that information five minutes later. Then maybe, just maybe I would be able to see her across the bullpen instead of the temporary agent that The Toothpick made Gibbs take on to complete the team.

I stand by my actions that night and those actions could have gotten me killed. I knew when I saw Rivkin standing at the door instead of Ziva, there was a good chance that it was going to me who died. But I couldn't just walk away and let him leave the country or worse find another place to stay in the US where NCIS couldn't get a crack at him. Yet I can't help but wonder what could have been had things turned out differently. Would I still be alive, would Ziva be as conflicted over my death as she was over Rivkin's? I don't know.

As the days begin to bleed into each other, I still wonder what happened to Ziva. I wonder if I'll ever see her again. If we'll ever be able to have a moment where we resolve what happen to us. As partners, as friends, as lovers...will we every get that moment. Once again, I thought of Casablanca.

Ziva and I had had our Paris moment...now all I wanted was a Casablanca. Just a moment to tell her I'm sorry for the way things turned and maybe a chance to end things without a sea between us. Just to know that she's safe. Just to be able to tell her this one line, _"Here's looking at you, Kid"._


	6. Live your Life

Hello to all!! I'm soo sorry about not posting sooner. It's been a crazy week here and I got distracted. But hopefully this should make up for the wait .

And this is the second to last chapter. If y'all have an suggestions for the quote for the last chapter, I'd love hear them.

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_Maria, these walls were not built to shut out problems. You have to face them. You have to live the life you were born to live. –Reverend Mother in The Sound of Music._

_I won't forget you now. – Ziva in Dead Man Walking, NCIS_

Waking to sound of silence, She waited for the blow that never came. It seemed that they had decided to leave her alone for the moment. Opening her eyes or trying to see through the swollen eyelids that were crusted with something, she assessed her condition. Was it tears or was it blood? Given the fact they had been torturing her for information, it was more likely to be blood. Mentally shrugging her shoulders, she continued making a list of her injuries. A couple broken ribs, swollen face, cut forehead, two or three broken fingers, and various burns over her body was the total.

She knew that she would not be the same when she left for the mission but she assumed that she would be dead before something like this would happen to her. She was a Mossad assassin who was very good at her job or at least she was until she went to work for NCIS. Now she was not so sure. Yet she could not blame all of her injuries upon her time in America. She knew that had her father acted more like a father instead of the Director of Mossad, she would not have had to choose between NCIS and him.

She paused as footsteps began to echo down the hall. Surely this would end soon. At times, she longed for the peace that death would bring. Even if she were to come out of this alive, highly unlikely, she would still have to face the conflict that was sure to occur between her and her father. And if she survived that, then she would have explain herself to Gibbs. The prospect of fighting all of those emotional battles made her feel even more exhausted than the torture that they had been performing on her.

The door creaked open as a man whom she had never seen before came into the room. Through her limited vision, he was short and was wearing some sort of fatigues. He stared at her for what seemed like forever. Then he spoke, "So you will not give up the secrets of the Americans." She said nothing, waiting for the moment in which he got angry and did something or left her alone. He then began to pace around.  
" I long to understand why you are so devoted to them. They left you in Israel. They killed your half brother and your lover. They forced you to reconsider your loyalties to your home country" He paused, looking at the woman before him. She was beaten, bruised, burned within an inch of her life. Whomever had done this was a professional, for they had taken her to that inch over and over again. Yet she too was a professional, for she had said nothing but a handful of words during the entire process.

She watched him as he had hurled questions at her and expected her to answer. Yet his words were nothing she had not heard before. She almost expected them. He stopped pacing and then slowly came closer to her, stopping just before her. Slowly as if considering each word, he spoke. " You expect to die here. You know that you will never give up the information we seek willingly. For you are mossad and you are NCIS. You are a woman who has been well trained. " He paused waiting for his words to sink in. "You expect the questions that I ask. You expect the torture. Yet you refuse to give in and allow us to give you the peace of death."

As he continued to ask questions, she continued her silence. Yet his questions began to make her question herself, her judgment and her loyalty to NCIS. As the doubts began to assail her, a scene from one of her favorite movies came to her mind. Maria had run back to abbey because she realized that the Captain was in love with her and she could not handle it. But the Mother Reverend had told her something that Ziva had always like but was never able to completely accept. Now as the man kept asking her why she would not give up the information, she realized that she had to survive, because death would be a kind of giving up. For as the Reverend Mother said, "_You have to face them (your problems). You have to live the life you were born to live._"


	7. Empty Yesterdays

Special Thanks to **Scare4irony**, **Ranuel U. Owle**,** ltjvt1026**, and **NicoleRayn** for all the help, quotes and encouragement!! I couldn't do it without you guys!!!

Okay so I said that this would be the last chapter but because of the response that I've gotten and because my muse has decided to come back, i'm going to extend this fic just a little bit longer. I'm not exactly sure how long it will but it's going to be interesting seeing what happens along the way!

Disclaimer: I don't own them...but i do own a new betty crocker cookbook!! Excitingness.. now onto the story!!

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_You pile up enough tomorrows, and you'll find you've collected a lot of empty yesterdays. - Harold Hill, The Music Man_

_It's not the same. You get used to seeing someone every day, talking to them, relying on them, and suddenly they're not there... Tony in Agent Afloat, NCIS_

He was just sitting there. She was just lying there. Both waiting, not knowing what would come next. Both wondering if they had the strength to withstand the test that they were in. A test that only followed many other tests that they had undergone that year. Yet with each test, the stakes had only gone up. These stakes had risen from merely being apart of their jobs to being fights for their lives and for their very sanity. It seemed like these tests would never stop coming, sometimes they would appear to cease and then seemingly out of nowhere a new one would come. They would deal with it in their own way and together...at least at first.

But after each test, when they passed and recovered enough to piece back together who they were, both man and woman wondered if it was worth it. They're being together as lovers, as friends, and more importantly as partners. Was it worth the fight? And after every fight, they lost apart of who they were as a team and as people. Was that loss the reason they were unable to come back together after being tested as team for the first time? Or was it just something that was just waiting to happen?  
She wondered if it was possible to make so many mistakes. He wondered if it were possible to come back from all of those mistakes. They both wondered if their lives would ever recovered from the bombshell that had hit their lives mere months ago. It was truly an Armageddon of a test. One that that had they faced it two years ago or even a year ago, they would been able to face without any trouble.

The trouble was that ever since that first test, their relationship had begun to form cracks. Those cracks turned into faults, the faults into gorges and the gorges into the abyss that was left of their relationship. Now they were on opposite continents instead of opposite parts of the bull pen. Instead of trading insults and wisecracks, they were trading silence and loss. He tried to get through the day without thinking of her and how she would mess up the American idioms. She tried to get through the day without thinking about the way he constantly brought up those movies that were all apart of his facade.

Yet as each day passed, neither man nor woman was able to keep their thoughts off the other. Even if he had killed her boyfriend, he had done in an effort to protect her. It wasn't an intentional thing, otherwise why would he have come alone? She knew that once she got out of the terrorist camp, if she got out, she would talk with him. Maybe not civilly and maybe not calmly but honestly and openly. Even if she had hidden the fact that _He_ was back in the states and that he wasn't here to protect Israel's interests as _He_ had claimed, she did do it because she was in love just as he had thought he was in love when he was on assignment. It was intentional but he understood why she had done what she had done. If She ever came back, he would make an effort to talk to her and actually listen to what she had to say. It might not be neat, or clean but it was something that had to be done.

The Man just sat there as he attempted to work on a cold case file. The Woman just lied there as she waited for the next torture session. They both wanted to know what was going on in the other's world. Both wanted to know whether they as individuals would be able to make it out of this test in one piece. The first test had begun when they had been a team and when the director had been a woman who actually understood them. The second had been when they had been broken up as a team and sent to various parts of the globe. The third, fourth,fifth had been when they had been sent out to play war games, not knowing that they were bait.

The tests seemed to have abated until the last four months in which they were a team. Those tests were smaller yet they did more damage than the bigger tests. And once those bigger tests had hit, they had crumbled as friends and as partners. And led to the man just sitting and the woman just lying. It also led to their boss, wondering what he was going to do with the situation.

On one hand, Ziva had lied to him. By not telling him what the true situation was with Ari, She had lied by omission. On the other hand, she had proved her loyalty a thousand times over. Yet she had concealed the fact that Rivkin was back in the States, especially after he had killed two informants and an American Agent. On the other hand, she had provided the information that they needed to determine who had blow up her apartment. Their boss, Leroy Jethro Gibbs, just shook his head at the mess that his agents had gotten into.  
For Ziva wasn't the only one who stepped in it. Dinozzo had gone and gotten covered in it. He was the one who had killed a Mossad officer. On one hand, he had been following Gibbs' orders. On the other hand, he had gone alone and confronted a Mossad officer. A Mossad Officer who, had he not been drunk, would have killed Dinozzo. On the other hand, Dinozzo had gone alone to protect a friend. It may have not been protocol but it was what Gibbs had done in the past to protect a friend. He sipped his coffee as he walked back to the NCIS building and back to the cold case files that awaited him there.

As he neared the building, his cell phone began to ring. Terse and quick to the point, the caller let Gibbs know that the director needed him in his office asap. Gibbs walked past the team after he gotten back to the NCIS team and up into the directors office. Once this action would have caused speculation and looks from his team but no longer. Ziva wasn't there, McGee was involved in his work and Dinozzo worked in silence. Gibbs hoped whatever it was that the director had for them, that it didn't involve a probie. He had enough on his plate without trying keep up with a probie. Yet what Vance had, shocked him beyond his wildest dreams.

He was just sitting there. She was just lying there. Both waiting, not knowing what would come next. Both wondering if they had the strength to withstand the test that they were in. A test that only followed many other tests that they had undergone that year. Yet with each test, the stakes had only gone up. These stakes had risen from merely being apart of their jobs to being fights for their lives and for their very sanity. And now it seemed like they were being given another chance. The man sat there on a military cargo plane wondering how this was happening. The woman lay there on a hospital stretcher in pain beyond belief and still wondering how she was alive. Their boss sat a few away from them, watching them both. He knew how rare this chance was, even if it was just a chance to talk, to resolve issues. He could only hope that they were willing to take the opportunity and work out a few of their issues. For he knew from experience _"if you pile up enough tomorrows, and you'll find you've collected a lot of empty yesterdays" _

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_**Okay now it's your turn...please press that review button and let me know how I'm doing. I like hearing about anything that you think that can be improved or any quotes you think I should put into this fic!! Please review!! Thanks!!**


	8. Make Mine

Well apparently my muse has decided that it will come back if I'm willing to work at it. I decided to write from someone's else perspective that I've not written from yet. Hope I do a credible job of channeling this person's voice. Special thanks goes to** Scare4irony**, **Ranel U. Owle** and **Nicole Rayn**, your encouragement and advice helps keep me on track!!

Disclaimer: The only thing I own is my computer and the thoughts that randomly pop into my head.

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_"Go ahead, make my day" -Clint Eastwood as Harry Cahallan in Sudden Impact._

_"This never turns out well for the kids." -Tony in Ex-File, NCIS_

Their desks were empty and there was an email from the Director. He couldn't believe it. He was left behind again! Everytime someone had to go somewhere, he was the one left behind. When Dinozzo had to go to South America, Kate went with him. When someone had to go to Iraq, Dinozzo and Jardine went. When the director needed someone to escort her to an agent's funeral, Dinozzo and Ziva went. Granted that one didn't turn out so well, for anyone. That just set up a chain of events that both improved his life and ruined it as well. Everytime something changed, it meant that he was getting the short end of the stick.

However it seemed like the new director liked him more than he liked Dinozzo which was a plus in his favor. Yet the more he thought about the new director, the more uneasy he got. While Director Shepard never favored one team member over another for the most part, she also never made him want to hide all his secrets in the deepest pit he could find. And she never sent his coworkers, no..his family, to ends of the globe. And she never left a man behind...granted part of that was Gibbs's decision and Ziva's too.

It seemed like his world was falling apart around him. It seemed like his only constant these days was Abby and even then she was not the same bubbly person since Ziva left. She hadn't turned into Robot Abby, or overemotional Abby..she had just deflated abit..well more than a bit. But she was still the same.

It was Tony who had changed the most. He had gone from being cracking jokes and pulling pranks on McGee to being an agent who came to work, did his job and then went home. McGee shook his head and started working on his paperwork and dinozzo's paperwork since he had left to go on some secret mission with Gibbs. McGee paused as he thought about Tony and Gibbs...Tony was turning into Gibbs. Tony might not have a boat building obsession but he was getting close to needing one with the way things had been going. Since Ziva...Since Ziva.. McGee couldn't finish the thought as he piled all the unfinished paperwork in a neat stack.

Yet he couldn't just leave it alone either. His co-workers had changed before his very eyes or perhaps the change had occured while they were seperated and thought they would never see each other again. And McGee was so grateful to see everyone back together as a team that he ignored the signs that kept reoccuring as the months wore on. While he might not have appreciated the tricks and jokes Dinozzo and sometimes Ziva pulled on him, he realized that it was one of the few ways Dinozzo knew how to toughen him up and show McGee that he cared about him. McGee had found that out the hard way when he had shot a Metro cop and Dinozzo had come by to cheer him up.

What had happened to his friends, his family? When did things go from bad to horridly worse? First Mossad had sent a man to show America that they weren't controlling their backyard well enough. Then that man turns out to know Ziva and turns up when Dinozzo goes to talk to Ziva. Yet instead of Ziva, it was Rivkin and Tony kills him and then the next thing McGee knows is that Ziva's Apartment is blown up and everyone but him and Abby were on the next flight to Tel Aviv. And of course McGee had to be the one to tell Gibbs that it looked like Ziva knew what was going on with Rivkin because of the emails. He couldn't help but wonder if that was the reason Ziva was left behind. Or at least part of the reason.

Nevertheless He was left behind again and he was worried that it meant that someone else was going to leave. He really didn't want to leave the agency on a secret mission. Those generally ended with someone getting hurt or worse killed. For a moment, McGee wished he could go back to the days in which the team was solid and had each other's backs. Then shaking his head, he pushed his chair out to go and get a coffee. Maybe the drink would shake his morbid thoughts and snap him out of his head.

Suddenly his phone rang and he picked it up. "McGee. Slow down, Abs. I can't understand you." Abby's voice which had been going a million miles a minute, slowed down and became short and to the point.. " McGee, I need you to come down to the lab. Pronto." McGee furrowed his brow and changed directions to the elvator instead of the break room. "Okay Abs. What's going on?" Abby became excited as he entered the elevator, " I can't tell you over the phone. It's too big." His phone beeped as she ended the call. McGee pushed the button down to Abby's lab. He wondered what was going on.

First Ziva leaves, then Gibbs and Dinozzo leave on a secret mission, and now Abby was giving his secret orders. The world had certainly turned topsy turvy since the team had been broken up over a year ago.

Walking into Abby's Lab, he found her talking furiously on the phone with someone. It appeared to be someone who could understand Abby well because she was very excited. He didn't know what was going on but whatever it was, McGee was sure it had something to do with Gibbs. Finally Abby got off the phone and started typing furiously on the computer. He cleared his throat.."Uh.. Abs? You wanted me?"

She waved him over to the computer and said, " Do see that dot?" Confused McGee nodded. Abby continued, " Well that dot represents Gibbs, Tony and.." she paused for special effect as McGee continued to gaze at her in confusion. "Ziva!" Abby jumped up and down and then as if remembering herself, stopped jumping. "Ziva? She's coming back?" Now McGee was really confused. "shh..not so loud, it's kinda a secret." whispered Abby, smiling so big her eyes seemed to grow even larger than McGee had ever seen before.

"But if she's coming back, why all the secrecy? Why can't she just come back like she did last time?" whispered McGee. Abby shook her head and began typing and whispering an explanation of sorts.

"I don't know. All Gibbs would tell me is that they aren't really there and that they aren't really bringing her back stateside. But what I do know is that if Mossad finds out about this..it's not going to go down well."

Now He understood. For whatever reason, only Gibbs and Tony had been chosen to be apart of a recovery team or a rescue mission. Either way, Mossad had obviously had washed their hands of Ziva and her mission and should they find out what America was doing..well as Abby said..it was going to be pretty but this was his family. And for once, McGee was tired having it ripped apart everytime someone decided to further a political aim or pursue an obession. A line from a movie ran through his mind and it fit the situation. From now on, if someone was to try to pull his family apart, all he would tell them is _"Go ahead, make my day."_

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Now it's your turn...please let me know how I'm doing! I love to hear what you think, good or bad!! Thanks!


	9. Having the Stars

**Wow..This has been such a thrilling experience!! I absolutely love the response that I've gotten from everyone on this story. If you've given me a quote, don't worry I will use it! I'm just trying to find the best place for it!!!**

**Disclaimer: I only a pair of swollen feet from standing on my feet all night....now onto the story!!**

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_"Oh Jerry, Don't let's ask for the moon. We have the stars."-Bette Davis in Now,Voyager_

_" It blew away a lot of things" - Tony in Bury Your Dead, NCIS_

As the lights slowly dimmed and then turned off, I was left with the feeling that there should be more to it than this. More than just coming to work and then leaving to go back home. I knew that I had a great job, an amazing boss, not to mention the group of people that I worked with was incredible. Yet with everything happening, it seemed like my job had gone from Adams family to Friday the Thirteen, just one scary Axe murderer wanting to rip my happy world apart by either taking someone else or by killing them.

When I think about it, only two of them had ever died that I knew of. But it didn't make it any easier. I had hoped things might stay the same for longer than they did. I had hoped that my life would be complete again after a period of unrest and uncertainty. Every time, there was unrest and uncertainty, I didn't function well. Especially when it considered people who I considered family.

Family. I paused as yet another light shut off as yet another person went home to perhaps their family. Yet I came to work to see my family, not to leave it. Everyone who I considered apart of my wacky work family had a special place in my heart. And when they left or something happened to them, I didn't handle it well. I didn't fall apart but I always held out hope that maybe they would come back. And they would always realize that they had made a horrid decision by leaving our family.

Yet they weren't always responsible for leaving me or our family. Sometimes their leaving had nothing to do with anyone except management. Who, believed that our family was better suited to being split up. If I had anything to do with that decision, then I would have slapped them into reason.

Maybe not that drastic of action but something should have been done to them. If they hadn't been split up, then maybe things wouldn't have turned out the way that they did. People wouldn't have reverted to their former selves and the trust that had been built over the last few years wouldn't have been destroyed. I can only hope that there's enough of it to begin again. And then maybe my family will come back too.

I begin to gather my coat and lunch box and get ready to leave for the day when my lab phone begins to ring. The answering machine picks up as I am off the clock and refuse to stay any longer in a place which has begun to haunt my dreams. I almost didn't hear the voice on the other line but at the last minute, recognition stirs and dropping everything, I race to the phone. Barely picking it up in time, I burst out with a ton of questions. They attempt to answer as I race to my computer and start typing furiously in an attempt to find what they need as well as them. This was my family and I was fighting to keep them together. Finally, I find the answers I have been looking for. It might not be the best answers but when your family calls you en route from Somalia, saying they need forged documents for the Israeli who has become your sister, you drop everything just to find the answers, any answers which might break the living nightmare your life has become. And for someone who is a goth, dresses in pretty much all black, and sleeps in a coffin, that's saying something.

After finding the answers, I call the other member of my family who I'm not sure if he's a brother or more than that. He's an MIT grad and loves to brag about it or at least he used to. Now he's more subdued. Much like the rest of us. Yet after we got the news about Ziva, McGee perked up and put in as much time as he could without drawing attention to what he was doing. Even with all of McGee's help, there wasn't much we could do until Gibbs contacted us with more information about what to do next. And now that he had, I needed all the help I could safely get. I got off the phone with McGee, who like me, had been getting ready to leave NCIS for the day. He was coming back downstairs to my lab. Or as I like to call it " Labby". It contained my babies and my life. Major Mass Spec, my computers, and all of my other testing equipment that allowed me to do my job.

But I digress, for my job was to create a believable profile that matched Ziva's looks and who she was as a person without giving away who she really was. I turned as McGee rushed into the room and began asking questions. Where was Ziva, was she okay, how was she getting past customs and other questions that I couldn't begin to answer.

As he caught his breath, a phrase from the last movie Tony and I had watched together popped into my head. I had started watching movies with him to keep from missing Ziva too much and to keep Tony from doing something he regret. It's what families do, support each other when times are hard. And while I didn't know where Ziva was, or how she was doing, or even how we had found her, I do know that by finding her somehow in someway we had been given the stars. It was all I could say to McGee before he caught his breath. _"McGee don't ask for the moon, we have the stars".

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**Okay guys, you know what to do...leave a review!!! please!! it's helps me because it gives me an idea of how I'm doing and if I've caught the character whom I'm attempting to write from...seriously I'm a little nervous about this chapter....i'm branching out...a little reassurance always goes a long way...please please review!! (okay now i'm done begging).. Thanks for reading!!! I am very blessed to have such a wonderful readership!!**


	10. Just Whistle

I'm SOOO sorry for not updating sooner!! It's been a crazy couple of weeks and RL has reared its lovely head and reminded me that there is more stuff to do than just sit and write NCIS stories, as fun as that is and all.

Special thanks to ltjvt1026 who suggested the quote that I used for this chapter!! Thanks to everyone who has put my story on alert and favorite!! I really appreciate that as well as when you **_review_**...it warms my heart to see how other people react to my little ole' story...

Disclaimer: I only own two loaves of challah braid bread and that's it!

now onto the story!!

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_"You know you don't have to act with me, Steve. You don't have to say anything and you don't have to do anything. Not a thing. Oh, maybe just whistle. You know how to whistle,don't you Steve? You just put your lips together and....blow." -Humphrey Bogart & Lauren Bacall in To Have and Have Not_

_"I'm tired of pretending. " " So am I" -Tony and Ziva in Cloak, NCIS_

Tired..so tired...where am I ? I hear buzzing noises, i can hear low voices just around the corner... "...'ll be fine..just needs rest...just talk..." The voices fade as they float down the hall.. i wonder who they are talking about...who needs rest and who needs to wait for rest...i could use some rest...i just want to fall back aside..i'm not even sure why i'm even up or why i need to be up...but for some reason i am up...and for some other reason, i know that my tiredness comes from more than lack of sleep and the need to fix that... i can hear people walking outside of my room and i prepare myself for an attack or a torture that surely must be coming...i want to let go so that i can't feel anything...if i can think, i can feel and if i can feel then the pain is far worse...

yet they move on and don't come into my room.. I begin to check out my surroundings...it would appear that i've been moved to a hospital...and i begin to get nervous...why am i in a hospital? what purpose does this move serve? I'm no good to them alive. If anything I'm worth more to them dead....yet I know that I'm in a hospital...and eyelids begin to droop as I try to figure everything out...just attempting movement and figuring out the little that I know is wearing me out....yawn...i need to stay a..a..awake...tony would never let me live this down..super spy not knowing where I'm at or why i'm there before....

Suddenly there's pressure on my hand and I hear a familiar voice...surely this has to be a dream...surely...I must be dreaming...well as long as I'm dreaming.. I'm going to listen... The voice was rough as they had been awake for many hours and had only just caught a short bat nap...yet it was also smooth and could have held the confidence of all the world....but it had more emotion in it than just those two...I was too tired to figure out what...sorrow, joy...perhaps...but perhaps listening to more than just the sound of the voice would explain what was going on... but i was too tired to open my eyes so i just focused on listening to those words.

"Zi, I really messed up.. I know I did the right thing but letting you go...and not telling you how I really felt when I had the chance was a huge mistake.." He laugh, a dry laugh with experience and regret colouring the sound. " I should have told you when I got after the Seahawk and when I was transferred back to D.C. Maybe if I had, you wouldn't be here in the hospital, tubes going everywhere and monitors...maybe I wouldn't be here waiting, hoping, praying that you wake up,so I can talk to you and maybe fix the mess that we seem to be in...if there is still a we..." the man stopped and took a shaky breath and continued " Abby can't wait to see you. I'm sure she'll have a big hug and some black flowers for you and Probie is busting at the seams with questions and is worried about you...I'm sure he'll have something quite appropriate...and Gibbs...not sure what he wants other than like me, I need to see you open your eyes. I always loved your eyes, deep chocolatey brown and it was always my favorite sight to see in the morning...especially in the morning regardless of whether I had a date or not.. " He fell silent and I began to remember what had happened before I woke up... It was all flashes but the helicopter, the marines and Gibbs and Tony coming to save me from the mess I gotten into were the strongest images... I was soo tired but I needed to let them know I was okay.

I opened my eyes and found Tony attached to my arm and I could see Gibbs outside my door talking to someone in the distance. I looked back at Tony and found myself starring into the questions that had been bothering me since I left D.C. for Israel. What would happen to us, How do we recover from this as friends, as partners...Whether we would be something more, I could not say...it would take time. Finally I broke the spell and uttered the words I had been waiting to say since I had been captured. "Thank you for coming for me but why? What good am I if I get caught within weeks of getting my new assignment? And now I can' t be any help to you because by the time I am ready to go out into NCIS, I will be recalled back to Israel for another mission." I begin to get hysterical even though I never get that...must because of all the weeks of torture and not knowing...

Tony got up and looked me straight in the eye and said something I'll never forget.."You are not worthless...you mean a lot to Gibbs, to McGee, to Abby..Did you know that she counted the days when Vance split up the team after Director Shepard's death? Did you know that when you didn't come back she freaked and became all mopey...it was worse than when Gibbs left..." At my shocked expression , he chuckled " It's true...but mostly you mean a lot to me..and even if you hate my guts and never want to see me again... I just wanted to know that you're safe."

I couldn't believe it as Tony began to tell how the team and Ducky, Palmer and Abby had missed me in their own unique ways. He finished with something that I would have never thought of... I had grown up with some pop culture and new things but things changed so quickly and I was always on a mission and had no time for anyting else... "Ziva.. I know things aren't perfect but y_ou know you don't have to act with me. You don't have to say anything and you don't have to do anything. Not a thing. Oh, maybe just whistle. You know how to whistle,don't you, Ziva ? You just put your lips together and....blow."_

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_So now just let me know what you think by pressing that lovely green button!!! Can't wait to hear what y'all think!!_


	11. Crumble to Dust

_Well I'm glad to see all of those reviews!! Thanks to everyone who has been following my story! I never dreamed that something like this could blossom into something as big as it has. Special thanks to **NicoleRayn** **sarahsrr**, **Ranel U. Owle**, and **Scare4irony**!!! Thanks I love y'all's input and this story wouldn't be same without y'all! _

_This Chapter is Dedicated to** Scare4irony** who suggest the quote for this chapter!!_

_Disclaimer: I only own Crime and Punishment (which I just finished...bizzare book) now onto the story!!_

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_"What have you done? Thousands of years of building and rebuilding, creating and recreating so that you can let it crumble to dust." H. Gerorge Wells (The Time Machine - 1960)_

_Ducky(refering to Gibbs' infamous gut): Well it usually serves him well._

It could be one of those days in which everything goes well or it could be one of those days where nothing goes right. One never knows which it shall be when one is waking up. Lately I'm beginning to wonder if there will be day when everything wil go right. I used to be fairly optismistic about life and to a degree I still am. But there are parts of life that I shall never look upon in the same. I suppose it began with the coming of Ari Haswari.

Now that was a man who knew his medicine and his cars. Unfortunately, he also knew the episonage game and the game of a double agent far too well. He pulled the wool over everyone eye's except for Gibbs and his team.... And Gibbs ended up paying the price for that, for that was the first time that he ever lost a woman agent and as hard as it was for Anthony and Timothy to lose Catilin, it was far worse for Jethro.

He had grown up in a time in which women were not allowed to fight and when they were given the right to fight, he had never been in direct combact in which either he was fighting with women or he was in charge of them. Now once he came to NCIS, things changed. He started working with women after Franks quit. And his first probie was Jenny Shepard. Director Jenny Shepard, if you were give her full title. One she had to fight for and she had to make many sacrifices to forward her career. I always wondered if Jethro was one of those sacrifices or was she just another of his "wives" and had never made it to the wife status?

But despite her status, there was always a special relationship between her and Gibbs, regardless of whether they were just talking about general stuff or specific cases. And until the frog and her illness, there wasn't much that was not known to those two. However after Director Shepard made it clear that she was willing to go after the frog, no matter what the costs and risks, Gibbs was never quite willing to trust her completely. Yet he rarely trusted anyone completely, oh there were a few. I supposed I was one of those.

Yet we had known each other for years, he had put up with my stories and reminising and I put up with his gruff manner and to the point questioning. Another one that made the list was Mossad Officer Ziva David.

I was never able to figure out why those two were able to trust each other so completely, so quickly.

Gibbs never trusts anyone that quickly, usually he puts newbies or probies as young Anthony calls them, through a obstacle course. If they are able to keep up and still manage to function, then he begins to trust them. However with Gibbs that can take up to years... or as with Officer David, overnight. I suspect that something traumatic happened between the two of them that affected them both quite heavily.

But I digress. When the call came from Abby and she traced it to Somalia, Gibbs and Anthony rushed off to Africa. I only found out after the fact when Abby came down to autoposy seeking reassurance and comfort. And now that they have found Ziva, I have been abandoned but I supposed it is okay since I too have abandoned autospy for another hospital room. Ever since Ziva had been found and brought back to the states, we had been taking shifts so that we all can get a chance to sleep and stil manage to go to work in the morning.

As I sit here watching the Mossad Officer who has made such an impact upon our lives these last four years. I wonder if she is aware of the effect she has had on this team, especially after she left the team for Mossad. I think she gained an inkling of what she means to this team after the first separation. She was sent back to retrieve information about a petty officer who was invovled in some pretty deadly stuff. I never was quite sure why she was sent back or even why Gibbs' team was broken up. All I know is that they were broken up to suit Vance's purpose and for a short while they were brought back together. And then everything with that mossad officer who was seeing Ziva occurred and the team was thrown into chaos.

Yet it would appear that everything has fixed itself...Ziva is now back stateside, Gibbs and Tony are back from their coffee run and are talking with the doctors who appear to be hopeful in her recovery. I know that there is or rather was something once between young Anthony and Ziva, otherwise Timothy would have never written about it in his book. And while they have lost it or perhaps it has changed into akin to hatred, they will have to decide what to do with it. For Gibbs' team to be recreated as it used to be, they have to resolve this issue. Otherwise it will have all been for naught.

I have lost some of optimism in the recent years and have not been able to view certain events with hope. Yet now I am able to do so. I have faith that young Anthony and Ziva will be able to sort things out and Gibbs will be able to have his entire team back. It will be a long road but it will be worth it in the end. I just hope they don't allow all of their team to crumble to dust as they did the first time they were brought back together....hmm..this reminds me of a quote from a movie..oh yes...._"What have you done? Thousands of years of building and rebuilding, creating and recreating so that you can let it crumble to dust."_

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**Now it's your turn!! Let me know how I did!! I'd love hear what y'all are thinking about this chapter!!**

**;) debook210**


	12. Tomorrow's Another Day

Thanks to **NicoleRayn**, **Scare4irony**, **Ranel U. Owle**, **sarahsrr**, and **ltjv1026** for suggesting quotes, providing editing help, and otherwise just giving me encouragement in writing this story. I couldn't have done it without y'all! Thanks to everyone read this story, even if y'all didn't review, the fact that y'all looked at the story made my day! To those of you who read and reviewed, Thank you sooo much I really appreciated it! I love reading what other people think about my writing even if it is critical.

For this last chapter, I chose to write from more than one person's point of view, so if y'all will guess (i've given some clues) in what order I write these people's perspectives, I'll make y'all a batch of virtual cookies and give ya some!! Thanks for participating in this!!

Disclaimer: I only own seasons 2,3 and half of 4 of NCIS dvd collections...nothing more.

And now onto the SHOW!!

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After all, tomorrow is another day- Scarlett O'Hara in Gone with the Wind_

_A man's heart often tells us how he lived. Sometimes, it might even tell us how he died, but contrary to popular myth, it never tells us how he loved.- Ducky in Ex-File NCIS_

After everything that had happened, it seemed almost anticlimactic watching him help her with everything. Granted that's the way life ought to be. A guy helping out his girl, no matter what. But life wasn't always so simple. Sometimes, instead of guy just helping out his girl, it turned into partners helping each other out in different ways. Both healing and both hurting.

It had taken time for them to even get to this point. They didn't have much going for them. There was the trust issue, he had broken up her last relationship and had kinda sent her, inadvertently, into a spiral of destructive behaviors..that and her father took advantage of her skills.

Then there was rescue. At first, she wouldn't accept help because of his role in the rescue and what it had cost him. Sure he had all four limbs and a head, despite the numerous times a day that Jethro "reminded" him of reality. But there was something missing, something that was essential to who he was as a person. That was due in part to waiting for some call, some sign that told him that she was all right. But the other part was due what he saw….

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I couldn't believe that Gibbs let us leave work early! It was always a good day when we got to leave work early especially when it wasn't because of a case. Usually if we got off early that meant that we had either wrapped up an emotionally draining case or we were in the middle of one and needed to recharge.

But there was reason for us to leave early. We were meeting Ziva, who was finally out of the wheelchair and now on crutches, not that didn't make her any less irritable, especially at Tony. He seems to think that she's made of glass and she'll break at the slightest pain or step she takes.

Of course that could be due to the fact that she was almost died because of the torture. I only saw her after they got back to DC and had her in the hospital…Just seeing her connected to all those tubes and wires and not seeing her awake was awful.

So perhaps knowing what I saw just in the room and the list of injuries that the doctor rattled off when telling us about her condition was horrible enough for me, perhaps I should cut Tony a break….

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I couldn't believe that Today was the DAY!! I've only been waiting for this moment ever since Tony told me that Ziva wasn't coming back to the States… I knew that something was wrong when he told me that. But I also knew that somehow someway that Gibbs would fix it! He fixed it the last time so I knew he would be able to fix this time..

Of course there were times in which I doubted but no more.. those doubts are forever raised to the ground and I have risen above them. Besides there are more important things to dwell on like…my new redecoration of Labby. It looks so much better with different pictures or perhaps a rearranging…anyways, Today's the picnic day!!

Ziva wouldn't go on a picnic until she was cleared for crutches…now I almost had to beg to get to agree to this and to pled with Gibbs….because while I can beg with an Israeli assassin, I won't go begging with Gibbs. I can however plead with him.

But Today's the day and its so funny watching Tony and Ziva try to get Ziva settled. They've made a lot of progress in their relationship as friends and as potential coworkers. I know Gibbs will give her a job but whether she will take we're all not sure about… I think that's part of the reason that Tony has been so careful around her and around her around Gibbs…

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"Okay, Okay. I get the memo. You can do it yourself" I held up my hands in frustration, in submission and in defeat. Ziva kept glaring at me as she lowered herself down onto the blanket and made herself comfortable…

Well as comfortable as you can get on a blanket on the Washington Mall. I was glad that Abby had asked Gibbs and Ziva for a dinnertime picnic. Gave me a chance to see my family again..

All of my family.

Seeing her here, is amazing.. When we took off in that cargo plane all those months ago, I never dreamed that we would be here all together celebrating something amazing. Celebrating our family.

To be completely honest, this has been hard on me. Not that I'll ever admit that to anyone. Finding Ziva in the place where she was, looking as awful as she did, did a number on me.

I knew that when she woke up, that all of those memories would come flooding back in. And she would hate me forever because if it wasn't' for me then she would still be in D.C. hale and hearty. So while I desperately needed her to wake up and begin mending, I cherished every moment that we had together. I could pretend that perhaps she was just in the hospital because of some bad guy that we got but not quite soon enough. It didn't always work but it worked some of the time.

After she woke up and started talking with everyone, we started working on our relationship…such as it was or is. I'm still not sure exactly where we fit as partners, as friends, or even perhaps as more than just friends. It's all kinda confusing….

* * *

"There that's better. See I knew I could do it!" Being able to do some of the simplest things was amazing. Three or four years ago, I would have scoffed at my amazement at being able to sit down on a blanket with those whom I consider my family.

But then again three or four years ago, I was still on lockdown, emotionally and was exactly who my father wanted me to be. An assassin who is able to go in and get the job done without any ties or connections other than those that would help Mossad. I was his personal weapon.

Things change.

Now I will not do whatever he asks, simply because he asks it of me. Now I will make connections and form relationships that have nothing to do with who I am or whose daughter I am or what agency I work unless I choose to do so.. I enjoyed working at NCIS while I was a Mossad officer attached to a team here in D.C. A team that became more than just somewhere to work. A team that became my family.

And now I can do whatever I want, as long as I don't overdo it and as long as I don't have Tony or Gibbs acting like mother hens. Well actually Tony is more of a mother hen but Gibbs is more of like a dragon who is actually quite friendly and is willing to listen to you but bump up against his secrets or his rules and you will get burned.

Currently, Tony and I are playing with fire. Because of the necessity of needing someone to help me until I have complete control of all my limbs and the lack of trust and many other things, Gibbs has been letting rule twelve slide for a few months. However once I go back to NCIS, He may not be so lenient….

* * *

Rule twelve was getting to be a bother these days. I knew I made it up for a reason (Paris) but with the situation between Ziva and Tony, it's getting hard enough to keep justifying it especially with everything that they've been through.

Yet I have my rules for a reason…and yet rules are meant to be broken.

I know I've broken enough of them myself. However I don't have to decide about that right now.. Right now I'm going to sit down and enjoy some good food, good weather and perhaps even enjoy the company…

For as Scarlett once said, (Gone with the Wind was one of Shannon's favorite movies), _"After All, Tomorrow is another day."_

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**Well I have a blast writing this story, getting comments from everyone to finding new quotes from both NCIS and classic movies. I have really enjoyed reading everyone's comments and reviews about the story. However...school is starting soon and I have to focus on my studies and 12 chapters is a nice even number and is far more chapters than I ever dreamed of writing. So thank you for your comments and please, please review this last chapter and let me know if I'm completely off based on any of the characters.**

**-Debook210**

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